God lives under the bed...

I envy Kevin. My brother Kevin thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night. He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, and I stopped to listen, 'Are you there, God?' he said. 'Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed...'

I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement. But that night something else lingered long after the humor. I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in.
He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult. He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will. He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.

I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life? Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and later to bed. The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child. He does not seem dissatisfied.

He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work. He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores. And Saturdays-oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to hav e a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. 'That one's goin' to Chi-car-go!' Kevin shouts as he claps his hands. His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.

And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips. He doesn't know what it means to be discontent. His life is simple. He will never know the entanglements of wealth of power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats. His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be.

His hands are diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it. He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished. But when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax. He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure.

He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue. Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. And he trusts God. Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an ‘'educated'’ person to grasp.

God seems like his closest companion. In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith. It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions. It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap ... I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances - they are all my own disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.

Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn? After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God. And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed. Kevin won't be surprised at all!
Author Unknown (to me anyway)

Snow...

We haven't had much snow this winter so far...three or four times with an inch to 3 inches each time but that hasn't stopped Phoebe from enjoying it! I can't wait to see how the girls are going to respond to their first snow experience!

Phone call pictures...

These are the pictures that were taken at the orphanage today during our phone call with the children.

One year ago today...

we sent off our application to Three Angels to start the adoption process. Our original plan..."ours" being the key word here...was to adopt only Samara. But as God worked on our hearts, three weeks later we started the process with Shakira as well. God completed "His" plan in June with the addition of Caleb. It's amazing to look back over the past year & all that has happened. I can't wait to see what this year brings!!!

On a side note, we had a Skype telephone call to the orphanage today to talk to the girls. Caleb was there as well but of course he didn't talk...although he did goo & ga some. We went to a friends house that has a web cam so the children could see us. We couldn't see them but will be able to soon after a web cam is sent down to the orphanage with the February mission trip. There was suppose to be a translator there to translate for the children & for us but she was not there so we had to "wing it." Sandy, the current orphanage house manager, said that Samara was sitting in front of the computer screen the whole time with her face up really close to it just looking at us. She talked a little bit at the beginning but then got quiet. They had to go get Shakira & she said "Hello Mama & Papa" & had some "help" from a friend to say "I love you" & then she jumped away. They brought Caleb last & although we couldn't have a real conversation with him, Sandy said he was looking at our faces & was listening to what we were saying. So that was great. Teared me up of course but it was good tears!

January trip...

Here are the pictures of my children that Colleen & Shanley took on their January trip. Caleb looks like he has gained 5 pounds since I saw him in December :o)

PJ Day!

I apologize for the blurriness of this picture but after 4 attempts to get a "PJ" picture this is what I got. Today was PJ day at Phoebe's preschool which meant they got to wear their PJ's & slippers to school as well as bring a stuffed something or the other that they sleep with along with them. They made hot chocolate but since Miss Picky doesn't like chocolate except for Oreos & brownies (hugh? yeah, I don't get it either!) the teacher made her a cup of hot tea from the tea bag I sent along. They made sugar cookies which is her favorite cookie...plain...no icing. Unlike me who would prefer to just eat a tub of icing as opposed to the cookie or cake :o)

Down in the dumps???

I don't know about you but I tend to get "blue" in the winter. The cold temps & lack of sun really mess with me. I use to despise winter but now I embrace it. I can't say that I "enjoy" it but I do enjoy what winter can teach me. The winter "season" is a necessity in our lives whether you live in a place where you actually have winter weather or not. It's a time that may seem barren & cold but it's a time for relaxing, rejuenating, & reflecting. I use to skip this season & would rush into spring without a clear direction or sense of purpose. Now I embrace my winter hibernation season because even though my skin maybe ghastly white & I have to wear a lot of clothes to keep warm, I am growing & rebuilding on the inside.

Many people prone to depression get really depressed in the winter due to the cold & lack of sunlight. I was reading Psalm 42 today & realized it mention depression.

Psalm 42
As the deer pants for streams of water, so I long for you, O God.
I thirst for God, the living God. When can I come & stand before him?
Day & night, I have only tears for food, while my enemies continually taunt me, saying, "Where is this God of yours?"
My heart is breaking as I remember how it used to be: I walked among the crowds of worshipers, leading a great procession to the house of God, singing for joy & giving thanks-it was the sound of a great celebration!
Why am I discouraged? Why so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again-my Savior & my God!
Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will remember your kindness-from Mount Hermon, the source of the Jordan, from the land of Mount Mizar.
I hear the tumult of the raging seas as your waves & surging tides sweep over me.
Through each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me, & through each night I sing his songs, praying to God who gives me life.
"O God my rock," I cry, "Why have you forsaken me? Why must I wander in darkness, oppressed by my enemies?"
Their taunts pierce me like a fatal wound. They scoff, "Where is this God of yours?"
Why am I discouraged? Why so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again-my Savior & my God!
NLT Life Application Study Bible
The following is the footnotes from Bible for verses 5 & 6. Depression is one of the most common emotional ailments. One antidote for depression is to meditate on the record of God's goodness to his people. This will take your mind off the present situation as you focus your thoughts on God's ability to help you rather than on your inability to help yourself. When you feel depressed, take advantage of this psalm's antidepressant: read the Bible's accounts of God's goodness, & meditate on them.

8 months old...

My "little man" is 8 months old today! I can't believe it! I can't wait until he & the girls are home!

Bizzarre trip to Wal-Mart...

I know that depending where you live in the county that bizzarre trips at Wal-Mart are quite common. I found that out from personal experience when we lived in NC. Our Wal-Mart's around here are pretty "normal." There is one around here that is busier than most & people sometimes get a little wild in the parking lot & the long check out lines but other than that it is pretty mild. Today, however, was an exception. Phoebe & I went there before I took her to preschool. We were there for a few minutes when my cell phone rang. I looked at the name & my heart sped up a bit because it was from a close friend of mine...one who had been waiting results from her MRI. I answered it & instead of hearing what I wanted to hear which was, "I'm fine...it was just a "blip" on the image." I heard, "They found a tumor on the frontal lobe of my brain." As my heart tried desperately not to sink & my brain searched for something spiritual & positive to say...she broke in & said, "The really good news is that they say it's really, really small...so small that they are just going to "watch" it for 4 months before they decide what to do."
Please join me in prayer for her total healing.

So after I got off the phone with her I was still a bit stunned & felt like I was aimlessly walking around in the store (which I probably was) until I was approached by an attractive looking man who looked to be about 45ish. Phoebe was sitting in the front of the cart. He said, "Mamm, I don't mean no disrespect." I said, "Ok." Figuring he was going to say some comment about Phoebe because that's usually who gets all the comments. He went on to say, "I just wanted to tell you that you're a very attractive woman." I graciously said, "Thank you." He then went on to ask me if I was married. I said, "Yes," & he said, "Some men have all the luck...and some men have none." With this I chuckled & said, "Thank you." We then parted & went our separate ways. I have no idea why that encounter took place. Maybe it was God's way of getting me to lighten up & take my focus off of my friend for a minute. Now that I look back at it, it was quite humorous. I was wearing a "sexy" Indianna hooded sweatshirt with jeans that are so worn there is a hole in one knee. Not to mention I had my darling 4 year old with me & I had just finished a pretty "endearing" rendition of Jack Warner's 80's hit "All I Need" (it was playing overhead in the store.)

I finished my shopping & went to one of the very long check out lines & stood patiently in line although Phoebe was already late for preschool. The lady cashier must have been new because I don't remember seeing her before & she talked about almost everything she scanned & put everything into bags...including milk, a large box thing, & a large bag of cat food. And what made this trip even more unusual is that Phoebe was very well behaved :o)

Smoke Signal!

The following devotion is from Dr. David Jeremiah & really speaks to my heart right now.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to
prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11, NIV

Recommended Reading
Isaiah 5:5-11

There is a story told of a shipwreck survivor who washed up on a
deserted island. After he had been there a few days, he built himself a
hut and prayed to God for rescue. Each day he anxiously looked out over
the horizon as he waited for God's deliverance in the form of a passing
ship. One day, after returning from a hunt for food, he discovered that
his hut was consumed in flames. He was devastated and believed it to be
the worst thing that could have happened to him on the island;
everything he had was gone. The next day however, a ship arrived and the
captain said, "We saw your smoke signal."

Sometimes, when it seems our whole world is crumbling, it is difficult
to believe that God is at work on our behalf. But just when we think all
is lost, God unfolds His plan and teaches us that He had it under
control the whole time.

Friends, God's ways are not our ways, His thoughts are unlike our
thoughts; His plans are so much bigger than we could ever imagine or
dream. Let Him work in His unique way and watch as His beautiful plan is
revealed in your life.

"Keep praying, but be thankful that God's answers are wiser than your
prayers!" William Culbertson

What we don't know...

This has been on my heart for quite some time but I have not felt directed by God to post about it until now. The longer I walk around on this earth, the more I see how our perception of others can affect our relationships with them & others. Sometimes we have an initial "gut" reaction to someone & sometimes it's right on target...sometimes it is not. I think many of us are too quick to judge someone on one thing without taking many other factors into consideration. Sadly we just don't do this with people that we may encounter on a more frequent basis, but that we also do this with complete strangers...some of which we will never see again. Why do we do this? How can we make ourselves stop doing this? In case you are unsure of what I'm talking about...let me give you some examples.

***You see a friend & her family eating at a restaurant although you personally know that they didn't have enough money to pay the electric bill this month. So you assume that they don't have enough money to pay their bills because they are spending their money on other things such as going out to eat. What you don't know is that your friend's mother sent her some money in the mail the day before not only to pay the electric bill but some extra so she could take the family out to eat...something they haven't done in three months.
***You see a mother or a father at a local store being really "harsh" with their child(ren). It's making you very uncomfortable & you just assume that this parent has some major issues & you are really concerned for the child's welfare. What you don't know is that this parent is one of the most loving & caring person's in the world & that this particular child is very strong willed & is constantly pushing the limits with their parents & after a long day of pushing them, slapped the parent in the face when you weren't watching.
***A waiter at the restaurant you visited is really rude & not focused at all on his job. What you don't know is that he just lost his wife & two year old son in a car accident three weeks prior.
***A friend of your's is to be in the upcoming wedding of her cousin. She loves her cousin dearly & has no "real" interest in her fiancee & expresses this to you, but also tells you that she feels like God is telling her that they won't get married & that somehow she will marry this person instead. You are totally baffled by this but you know that you're friend is a Christian & there is something causing her to feel this way. So you pray for her & the situation all though none of it makes sense to you until a day before the wedding, when her cousin is killed in a car accident. Two years later your friend does marry her deceased cousin's fiancee.

So what should we do in these situations? We need to stop our initial reaction of jumping to conclusions & pray. We do not know the whole story nor do we fully know what God is doing in people's lives. We need to pray for the people involved. To do anything more or less before praying can prove to be very harmful.

Not much to say...

I haven't posted since Friday not because I have been too busy or because I have so much to say that I don't know where to begin. No, it's quite the opposite. I just really don't have anything to say right now...surprising but true! :o) I have a lot of thoughts in my head & heart but nothing that is ready to come out to be written. I am mostly living day by day trying to keep it all together...living today & preparing for tomorrow. I look forward to the day when we find out that we're out of IBESR & in Parquet. Until then I am busy preparing the house. So far in the past week I have painted our kitchen, dining room, & hallway. I need to add a couple of finishing touches on them as well as paint the upstairs utility room the same color as those rooms. Then I will probably move onto painting the living room just because it's really "bothering" me. Then after that I will move onto the upstairs bathroom & then to Caleb's room. I have been ignoring his room a lot these days because it hurts to go in there & not have him there. Of course I miss the girls terribly too but I have one very "dramatic & high maintainence" girl here to keep me busy enough, plus she gives me lots & lots of hugs which I really appreciate :o) Also, my body has been doing some "strange" things for the past couple of weeks. Not sure what's going on with it but that has contributed to my "interesting state of mind" lately. Randy really needs to go play some golf but it is way to cold. It snowed yesterday but then melted soon after. So I will be back to more blogging when I have something productive to blog about it. Until then, please know that you are in my thoughts & prayers.

Different Shades of The Same Color...

I know some of you have already read the story that Shanley Knox did on our family & posted on the Three Angels Website under the section of "Photos & Stories of Adoptive Families" but she has now added photos to go along with it & I must say...she did an awesome job! :o) I encourage you to read the story if you haven't already done so...not to boast in ourselves but to boast in our awesome & mighty God who deserves all the glory & praise!!!

The Difference...

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read it straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America Contest.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.


How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. They are not second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.



Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.



Easier?

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are NOT the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones who care.

Please pray...7 more days!

I am urgently asking anyone who reads this post to please pray for my friends Tina & Ted who are in the process of adopting the cutest little boy named Spendy. When we were in Haiti in Dec. they had their DHS appointment but Spendy's birthmother decided at the last minute not to go & has until Jan. 14th to go & sign the papers or nothing else with the adoption can move forward. That means there are only 7 days left. Please pray that she will do what she needs to do. Please also pray that she will come to know the Lord. She was very closed to hearing about Jesus in December. Thanks so much for your prayers!

"Piece of My Heart" Part 2...

"A Piece of My Heart"

After several unsuccessful attempts at you tube I went back to the "trusty" picture trail. These are various pictures from my December Haiti trip. I left a piece of my heart in Haiti in July that has three beautiful names written on it...Shakira, Samara, & Caleb. Long after they are home with me, there will still be a piece of my heart left in Haiti...a country that God is still developing a love for in me even though it is so foriegn to almost everything I know & have here. I will always treasure the amazing memories that have been created through this most amazing journey that I am on.

You tube help part 2...

Okay, I knew this would not be easy for me...just because I know how these things go with me but I went in with a positive attitude & an eagerness to do it...but it didn't help :o( I have spent more time than I would like to admit trying to make my first you tube video. I have no idea what the problem is. Every time I try to upload it says it's uploading to "be patient it may take several minutes." Well several minutes has gone into hours with no upload completion to show for it. If you have any suggestions...please feel free to share :o) Thanky!

The Voice of the Spirit...

Randy forwarded this devotion by Dr. David Jeremiah to me today & I think it's especially revelant as most of us prepare to "race" through another year. There are times when we need to be quick but there are also times when we need to be slow. There are times to be loud & times to be quiet. Let this year be a year of listening to God's voice.

The Voice of the Spirit

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name,
He will teach you all things . . .
John 14:26

Recommended Reading
1 Corinthians 2:9-12

It has become increasingly difficult in this day and age for us to hear
our own thoughts and feelings. In order to keep up with life, it seems
we must travel at the speed of society, never stopping to take a deep
breath and listen to the Holy Spirit's leading. As frustrating as this
may be, it is not a new challenge.

When Jesus walked the earth, He was constantly surrounded by a multitude
of people; but He knew that the most important relationship He could
invest in was with His Father, for it was His voice that would lead and
guide Him. Therefore, He spent a large amount of time in prayer and
conversation with God.

A lady was once asked how she knew the voice of the Spirit. She
answered, "How do you know your husband's step and your child's cry from
the step and cry of all others?" For her, the voice of the Spirit was as
familiar as the unique sounds of her husband and child.

In order for us to be sensitive to the Spirit's leading, we must spend
time getting to know His voice because the more intimately we know Him,
the easier it will be to hear His voice above all others.

Father, quiet my heart and mind so I may hear the leading of Your
Spirit in my life.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Well, it's a great start so far. We slept until 9:30am, had breakfast, & then watched Mizzou win the Cotton Bowl...yeah Mizzou!!! We then took down the rest of the Christmas decorations, cleaned, played, & watched more football. I stayed in my PJ's until about 2:30pm & didn't take a shower until 6:30pm. I then kicked back & watched the first show of the new Biggest Loser season. I should be in bed by now but am taking advantage of the quiet to finish some things I needed to do. The only thing that would have made this day better is if we would have had the other half of our family home with us. I am eagerly looking forward to them coming home this year & to all the things that God has planned for us. I pray that your year will be full of God's peace & blessings.