RUNNING!!!

Yes, you read right...as of today...I am running! This may not sound like a big deal to most people but believe me it is!!! When I was in high school I ran track for awhile & even after I quit track I kept running because I was obsessed with being "thin." It was nothing for me to run 10 miles a day. My running & exercise in general started to decrease as I started recovering from anoxeria. This was a several year process. My mistake however was in not seeeing "the big picture" of it all & how much "balance" is very necessary with most things in life. So I slowly started going the other way. Eating more & more food & exercising less & less until I finally stopped exercising all together. By the time I reached my heaviest weight wich was 206 pounds I would get winded just going up a few stairs. In July 2004, when Phoebe was 10 months old, I decided I had to do something about my weight. I joined Weight Watchers & lost a total of 41 pounds.

During that time I started exercising again & realized how much I missed it & how much of a "release" it is for me. So for the most part I have exercised regularly since then. Running however had never crossed my mind until about a couple of years ago when I was motivated to try it after watching a Biggest Looser episode. Immediately after I stopped, I had back pain.(For those of you who don't know, I had back surgery in 2002) I tried a couple of times after that but kept having back pain so I decided that I was not meant to run ever again. I would have to stick to fast walking & I was okay with that.

Fast forward to yesterday when I was having lunch with my very good friend & "soul sister" & she's talking about how she's running 6 miles like it's nothing. And this is from someone who didn't have a running history but a few months ago God told her "to run" so she did. I got on the treadmill this morning with the intention of walking 5 miles but as soon as I got on I felt like God said, "You can do this, you can run. You're back will be okay. You need to stop running to food & "literally" run!" So I did, & as I started running I realized that I have had always had a competitive spirit deep inside me but I had never really let it out when I was growing up because I had so many other things to focus on that seemed a lot more important than if I could beat somebody at a race, a game, or whatever.

My goal was to run 2 miles in 30 minutes. I know that is really slow especially when I ran track I could do it in 12 but you have to remember that I haven't run in years & I'm overweight so I thought this was a realistic goal. As I kept an eye on the time I saw that I was really going to have to pick up the pace at the end if I wanted to meet my goal. So I thought about my friend & I thought about challenging her to a two mile race some day...and me winning!!! :o) So I picked up my speed & made the two miles just a little over 30 minutes. Did I make it in 30 minutes? No. Did I fail? No. Failing is when you don't even bother to try. I ran faster & longer today than I did yesterday...which was not at all. So today I broke through a "barrier" in my head as well as my legs, lungs, & back...and I won!