Chocolate Chip Sweet...

I've had this post in my head for quite some time now...since Sept.20th to be exact...the day after my Grandma's death. For some reason I couldn't bring myself to even sit down to write it for awhile & then the time came that I could do it without it hurting too bad, I was too busy. I'm still busy but I have been convicted by God of not using some of the gifts he gave me so here I am...ready to write.

Everytime I look at a chocolate chip, eat one, or smell them baking in the oven...I think of my Grandma Evelyn. To me, chocolate chips = Grandma :o) If you know me at all, you know that I really "like" chocolate chips & I loved my Grandma dearly.

Some people have Grandma's that are super sweet people & are always kind & loving. My paternal Grandma was like that, but unfortunately she died when I was 9. I call them "sugar cookies." My Grandma Evelyn was definitely not a "sugar cookie" person. She was a "chocolate chip cookie" person. A regular person interspersed with intermittent bursts of sweetness & boldness. She never "sugar coated" anything. What you saw was what you got.

Yes, I am a lot like her. That's one reason why we butted heads a lot...especially as I grew older. But we always either made up or agreed to disagree. Some of my cousins were never blessed with seeing Grandma in "her prime." I am so thankful that I was. In her prime she shined brightly. Hospitality was her "middle name" & grit & determination were her back bone.

My parents divorced when I was 3 & 1/2. My mother & I spent the following 2 & 1/2 years after that living with my Grandparents. I will never forget that time. Although that period was very difficult for my mother for many reasons, it was a very happy time for me. I enjoyed being around my Grandparents & my Uncle Charles. It was like being in a family with 2 mothers, a father, & a big brother. My Grandpa doted on me. My Uncle wrestled with me. And my Grandma constantly hugged me & made me chocolate chip cookies.

Even as I grew older & had moved to a house with my mom, she still made me chocolate chip cookies when I came to visit. Grandma had a strong sense of "mother's intuition" & could always sense when mom & I were in trouble. She would always ask me what was going on because she knew I would tell it to her straight. She helped whenever she could.

I'll never forget the time when Grandma & I went to my mom's house to confront a man who was my mom's husband at the time, about physcially abusing her. I was in the kitchen trying to talk sense into my mom while my 70 year old grandma had backed the man into a corner & was pointing her finger at him & telling him "a thing or two." She had no fear that he could have snapped her into two like a chicken wing. He didn't move until after we left.

As my Grandma grew older & her health declined, her personality changed. It was very hard to see the changes in her. I kept trying to focus on her heart & not her mind. I knew that deep down inside of her, she was still chocolate chip sweet. I will always hold those memories of her in my heart.